Even the demon can be subdued by the power of faith
It was very difficult at that time to affirm the existence of God, to make God known. It was a situation in which my conscience was awakened. I was in the prison cell of Aiud. It is an old prison where our Romanians have suffered enormously since the time of Maria Theresa. This prison was renovated and used by politicians in those modern times of our history. It held about 2,700 inmates and looked like a large “T”.
From time to time the authorities would ask each prisoner what his profession was, and if you told them you were a priest they would treat you with great cruelty. They mocked you and tortured you. You could say anything, but if they heard that you were a priest, they would play all sorts of tricks and pranks on you.
And they’d come up to me and ask, “What did you do for a living?” I knew what was coming, and I thought I would get out of trouble, so I said, “I was a farmer. “Farmer? I’ll give you…” And to my surprise, he slams me against the wall, my brother, as if my lungs had burst, that I hadn’t expected it, it took me by surprise; when you expect a blow, you prepare yourself, but it’s harder otherwise. And years and years went by and I was left with this rebuke of conscience that I didn’t have the strength to admit at the time.
And then came the time of my rehabilitation[1]. It was an escape from the cells. What I mean is that they took us out of the cells in formation, in the inner courtyard of the prison, all 70-280 of us on a large balcony. They did this to prepare us for work: in the sewers, in the mines, in the construction industry.
At that time, people in the West, especially Free Europe, a Western radio station, learned about the violent torture of Romanian political prisoners. (…)
People in the West began to protest strongly. They had precise information about the intention to exterminate political prisoners, that what they [the communist leaders n.n.] were doing was being exposed, and then the authorities decided to take us to other places to work.
And here, in this meeting of prisoners, the first question was: “Who still believes in God? Who believes in this nonsense?”
And, you know, I felt a strong inner revolt. I realised that this was the moment, no matter what happened to me, even if they sent me back to my cell or to a labour camp. The regime was different: in a labour camp – it was easier, even if they exterminated you in both places.
When I heard the question, I jumped up. I was behind this group of about 120 men. I came forward, supported by others. We were all weak, we were shadows, ghosts. I came forward. The man said, “Come here” – pointing to his left. “Who else thinks like this?”. Only 7 stood in their places – their people – the informers who had infiltrated us and betrayed their colleagues. They kept me isolated for 9 days and gave me the usual rations: 200 grams of salt water in the evening and a 100-gramme piece of bread. When this diabolical treatment was over, the others asked me: “Why did you say you were a priest?”
How could I say I was anything else – I had had enough of the rebuke for my previous lapse. This time it would only be possible to declare another vocation if I renounced Christ.
He who speaks the truth may lose today, but he gains forever, for nothing is done without God’s knowledge; in everything there is a test and a proof of God’s love.
The others went to Baia Sprie, a mine about 160 km from Aiud. 160 km from Aiud. After two weeks, I was taken there in a prison car, in terrible conditions, and I stayed there for two years.
I didn’t recover very well mentally, but I paid for my previous sin. I don’t want to say that this was an act of courage on my part, so much as the result of that act was that the sin was atoned for. I said, “Lord, forgive me. I have sinned and I wanted to give myself to You at that dangerous moment. Everyone noticed me and, you know, the guards, the officers and the whole camp had a special respect for me. They still made fun of me, but I noticed it less. Over the years I had the opportunity to rehabilitate myself in prison.
And I saw how even a demon can be subdued by the power of faith.
(Fr. Justin Pârvu – Fr. Justin Pârvu and the Richness of a Life Given to Christ, Vol. I, edited by Hieromonk Teognost, Credința Strămoșească Publishing House, Iași, 2006, pp. 104-107)
[1] Christ the Lord tells us: “Whoever confesses Me before men, the Son of Man will also confess him before the angels of God. And whoever denies Me before men will be denied before the angels of God”. (Luke 12:8-9)
Out of fear, the Apostle Peter only said that he was not a disciple of Jesus, but this was considered a denial. However, Peter’s fall became an occasion for him to strengthen and perfect his faith, so that he would later confess Christ at the cost of his life. In the same way, Father Justin’s fall became for him a cause of strengthening in the faith, so that later he could confess God without fear, regardless of the suffering he endured.