Pieces of advice gathered from the testimonies of his disciples

Some of Fr. Sofian’s spiritual sons fondly remember their spiritual father and the advice he used to give. In a few pages we will try to share with our readers some of the pieces of advice of the great confessor of Bucharest.

He always told us to give alms. He used to say: “Give as much as you can, but give! Because almsgiving is great before God, it erases many sins! And other times he would say to us: “My son, almsgiving lifts you up to heaven and God hears your prayer”.

Father always asked us to give. That’s what he liked: to be merciful. He said: “If you receive, give. No matter how little. But give. If someone gives you a bagel and there is someone like you sitting next to you, a poor person, one of your brothers, break off a piece of the bagel and give it to him. For God is great, and perhaps with that little piece He can satisfy both of you”.

He also said: “When you give, don’t be sorry. Give with joy, for the angel is with you who will write you in the book of good deeds. And if you are sorry, he can’t write that you doubt in your heart. And God doesn’t like doubt. God is just and good and He wants us to be the same”.

Father was very sad to hear that women aborted their children. He had tears in his voice and said, “You should have a black fast on Wednesdays and Fridays, without a drop of water, because you have killed a human soul.” 

Father Sofian Boghiu said: “In fasting times it is very important to forgive each other.  You can starve to death, there is no point in fasting if you do not make peace with each other. Some people don’t speak to each other for years. But they fast every fast. Woe to their fast…”

Father told us many beautiful things about the Holy Communion. He always taught us something. He used to tell us that after receiving Holy Communion we should not talk, we should not get angry, we should not quarrel with each other, because the Holy Spirit is pure and good and he will not sit in you if you cannot hold Him.

Another time we asked him, “Father, how soon do we have to receive Holy Communion for the Spirit to come into us?” and he said, “Receiving Holy Communion is not a matter to be taken hastily. Some come after 40 days, others after a month, others more often. But I tell you that the Spirit remains in you as long as you do not expel Him. You don’t have to count the days, but have a good and pure heart. Then the Holy Spirit will be in you.”

Father also joked. Once I asked him, “Father, would you like some coffee?” but he said, “What do I need coffee for when I have a sore tooth?” He knew how to cheer you up and make you forget your troubles.

No one, no one, no one ever departed with him sad. He didn’t hurt you, he didn’t upset you. Sometimes we would stay with him and listen to him until 11 o’clock at night. And he would say: “Come on, you don’t have any more trams,” but we would say: “Father, we don’t want to go!”, “Well, where are you going to sleep?”, “Here on the floor in the church”. And he didn’t make us sad: “Ok, then! But just this once!” And that’s how we all often stayed.

He got angry with some people who did charity work in public. He asked us not to be seen giving, not to expect praise or kind words from those we helped. He looked after me all my life. I had many problems, my mother was sick, food was scarce. And he always shouted at me: “Ecaterino!”, “Yes, Father!”, “Stay a little longer!”. There were people around him, asking him questions… He couldn’t answer them. But he had his hands behind his back, with bags full of items. He’d give them to me when no one else was around. You could find everything you needed in those bags? Oil, sugar, etc… That’s how I often left.

Once I was in the kitchen, it was 11 o’clock at night, and I said to him: “Father, come here, the soup is getting cold”, and he said to me, “What do I need soup for? Do I live on soup?”

He liked to fast. He prayed, read and painted. But he’d eat late at night. Father prayed while he painted. He didn’t like fashion. He used to say to the women: “Don’t come to church all dressed up so that others will turn their heads after you. Don’t wear shiny clothes! Don’t wear make-up, don’t put lipstick on your lips. That means you don’t believe that God made you beautiful, that He made a mistake and you want to make yourself beautiful.”

He used to say, ”Forget about fashion! Come to church and pray!” Once a young boy came to him and said, ”Father, I came to church to find a wife,” and he said, “I thought you came to church to pray, not to get married. Come on! Pray and we’ll see what God wants to do with you.” When he scolded us about fashion, he said: “Get rid of the clothes that make you jealous! You come to church in clean, simple clothes!”

Father loved to teach us. We would sit in the church, he would take a stool from the altar and we would sit on the floor around him.

Father loved the canons. He would teach and rebuke you based on them.

“Father had the gift of working miracles. But I can’t tell. He saw. And he spoke to you as God revealed things about you. He asked me, “Are you a miss?” and I told him the truth. I had been living in sin for a month. He said to me, “Well, no more of that. From now on, stay here and love the Church.”  I never needed a man again and look, I’ve been in the Church for 60 years. And I wasn’t alone. The Blessed Mother of God gave me everything, and Father also took care of me. That was his gift with which he worked miracles. It changes your whole life”.

(Ecaterina T., 81 years old – an icon-maker of souls)